Sunday, July 29, 2012

Nietzsche Walks into the Vatican

Nietzsche: If Saint Peter holds up the Vatican, what holds up St. Peter?

The PopeSt. Peter stands on Jesus' shoulders. 

Nietzsche: What what does Jesus stand on? 

The Pope: God's testimony. 

Nietzsche: On what is God's testimony based? 

The Pope: My dear Nietzsche, it's God all the way down! 

Come for the wine,
Stay for the punchline...

Nietzsche walks into a Vatican promising to delight the hierarchy of truths with a stand-up comedy routine when he's stopped by a Swiss Guard.

"What's your business with the Papa?" Asks the Guard.

"I was invited here to perform a stand-up comedy routine...
About man's relationship to God...
It's called:

The Last Act

"Name kinda sticks with you, huh?" 
Says Nietzsche, high-fiving the guard. 

The guard checks the register, and sure enough, Nietzsche's on the list. 

A couple hours later...

If you're looking for the creator of man, of time and space, and of the world, look no further. 

We've finally found ourselves. 

What's this? asks a Cardinal. 

You're not suggesting that we are God?

Nietzsche pauses for a moment, then without skipping a beat, shouts: 

"Hey, who's that guy standing behind the Creator over there?" 

And everybody looked. 

"Where?" they asked. "We don't see anything." 

Nietzsche, continues and says:
If God is the Creator of the Universe, 
How come you looked to see who was standing behind him? 

I'll be here all night, 
don't forget to tip your waitress...

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