Saturday, August 18, 2012

Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit

If you are interested in becoming a CRAZY CAT LADY you'll want to first surround yourself with a large number of cats. Next, you'll want to choose a mental illness to complete the role. 

For those who prefer Obsessive Compulsive Disorders (OCD), you might want to consider organizing your cats (see below picture for example) according to personalities. This tactic also works with people who wish to choose Multiple Personality Disorder as cats can be classified by their individual personality type. 

For those who have issues with dander, there's always the hairless cat option. 

The key to being a successful Crazy Cat Lady is following the instructions in your Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit. 

1. Open up a Facebook page for each of your cats. 

2. Watch and record every episode of "Cats 101" on Animal Planet. 

3. Post warnings about how to not treat cats - never send them in the mail! 

4. Tell people that when a cat purrs, an angel gets its wings. 

5. Instead of having a human social life, throw parties for your cats!

6. Put up a NO DOGS ALLOWED! sign on your front door. 

7. When you go to sleep, download a recording of cats purring and meowing so that you can dream of cats. 

8. Take as many pictures of your cat as you can - from every angle. 

9. Post videos of your cats on YouTube. 

10. Superimpose a picture of yourself on a Nyan Cat. 
Post it on YouTube. 
11. Bonus: 
Watch this Simpson's Clip...
No cats were harmed during the writing of this post. 
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