Friday, December 16, 2011
Laughter Survival Training
First things first, have you laughed today?
If you're shaking your head no, then
LAUGHTER SURVIVAL TRAINING
might just be for
Take the FREE
Laughter Survival Training Questionnaire
1. Is your favorite lunch Kraft Macaroni and Paste? (Yes or No)
2. 3 words: Cherry Kool-Aid mustache. Got one? (Yes or No)
3. Did you take your Game Boy to the prom? (Yes or No)
4. Did you pioneer the Weather Channel's very first attempt at a sitcom? (Yes or No)
5. Would you go on Jeopardy and keep buzzing in and asking, "Alex, can I have some candy?" (Yes or No)
6. Do you have trouble following those convoluted Three Stooges plot-lines? (Yes or No)
7. Have you ever purposely attempted to score a perfect 0 on the SAT? (Yes or No)
8. While singing Ten Lords-a-Leaping, do you start humming after the fifth lord? (Yes or No)
9. Do you confuse defibrillator with Fry-O-Lator? (Yes or No)
10. Can you play the kazoo? (Yes or No)
11. Do you know the theme song for The Jetsons by heart? (Yes or No)
12. Do you own a fake Rolex to wear out to dinner while your real Rolex is safely tucked-away in your safe at home? (Yes or No)
13. Have you ever dropped 40 gallons of Gatorade on someone's head? (Yes or No)
14. In any of your dreams, have you ever found yourself straying into Klingon territory? (Yes or No)
15. Do you use the term Thingamajig more than once per day?
16. Is Polly Shore funny? (Yes or No)
17. Do you think the people at Radio Shack are lying? (Yes or No)
18. Have you ever used the word Knarly?
19. Have you ever tried to hypnotize yourself in the mirror? (Yes or No)
20. Did you have superhero pajamas as a kid? (Yes or No)
21. Did you ever wear Underroos? (Yes or No)
22. Have you ever had a fake ID confiscated? (Yes or No)
23. Have you ever had a hostile encounter with a vulture? (Yes or No)
24. Have you ever used baking powder to douse out a grease fire? (Yes or No)
25. Do you know how to pick up a tarantula without getting bit? (Yes or No)
26. Do you know how to co-opt a foreign dignitary? (Yes or No)
27. Do you cross your legs when you sit? (Yes or No)
28. Do you know Queen Elizabeth's full name? (Yes or No)
29. Do you know what scandal they tried to cover up in The Dreyfus Affair? (Yes or No)
30. Have you ever parachuted into a public event? (Yes or No)
If you answered yes or no to any of the above questions, we have absolutely no idea what that means psychologically. We can tell you, however, that if didn't laugh while reading the above questions, you need LAUGHTER SURVIVAL TRAINING.
If you laughed a few times, you need LAUGHTER SURVIVAL TRAINING.
If you laughed quite a few times, YOU MIGHT BE CHOSEN AS A CAMP COUNSELOR AT THE UPCOMING LAUGHTER SURVIVAL TRAINING CAMP.
If you laughed a lot, then inquire about our LAUGHTER SURVIVAL TRAINING CAMP FRANCHISE OPPORTUNITIES.
If you cracked up and are now forwarding this questionnaire to a friend, then inquire about how to invest in our corporate LAUGHING STOCK.