Sunday, October 16, 2011

Sophy's Mailbag

Dear Sophy Laughing: 

Hi! My name is Rick. I'm in love with a woman I've never met. We write each other 3 or 4 times a day, we text, and we even fax each other romantic hand drawn pictures. I have a great job and I know the economy stinks right now, but I'm seriously considering quitting my job and moving from Boston to Santa Fe just to be near her! She's witty, intelligent, funny, and looks amazingly fit in all her photos. Should I throw caution to the wind and make the big move? 

By the way, I don't actually have a job and we don't exactly fax each other, but she does reply to my Facebook posts and she always clicks "like" when I post an update. That's gotta mean something, right? 

- Rick in Love

PS: If I did have a fax machine, I would send her this drawing I made of us. I went to Kinkos and had it blown up and framed it. It's pretty cool, don't you think? 

 

Dear Rick in Love, 

I do think your drawing is very cool. Thank you for sharing it with me. 

I once mail-ordered a leather jacket from of a catalog. I was quite disappointed to receive what appeared to be dyed plastic in the shape of a jacket. But I'm hard to please. I'm sure plenty of people would have been grateful to spend $198 on a plastic leather jacket. I guess you could call me funny that way, cause I sure didn't. 

Anyhow, you might want to hold off on moving to Santa Fe until you meet this girl in person. I hear it's pretty hot in Santa Fe, does she wear sunscreen? What if she turns out to look like my mail-ordered leather jacket? All plastic-looking and dried out. Have you asked her which brand of moisturizer she uses to prevent premature aging? 

Have you considered asking her if you could fly to Santa Fe to meet her and take her out to dinner? This way, you can get to know each other and make sure you're both ready to take that next step before you rent that Uhaul (and I'm sorry, but no, I cannot cosign for you). 

Wishing you a safe flight to Santa Fe! 

Sincerely, 

Sophy Laughing

 
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