Monday, May 30, 2011

Less Is More

Unless you're anorexic, that is. 

Going on and on about physics, the philosophy of humor, and any subject requiring an advanced degree to simply navigate the terminology, usually isn't funny. 

Less is more, as they say. Take out everything that isn't funny. In my case, I'd be posting blank blog entries. While that might prove a subtle point, it's only good for a light chuckle, followed by an immediate dismissal of my more sincere inquiry on humor.  

I may not be a comedian, but I know that laughs matter. The problem is the moment I end a sentence with "matter" my daydreaming mind immediately travels to a sci-fi metallurgy shop where I'm tinkering with programmable matter that under precise conditions can be crafted into an invisibility cloak, which I would wear to trip very serious, pompous people so that they would fall down in front of discerning onlookers. This experience would force them to laugh at themselves, if only to tell the world that they have a sense of humor. 

Point being, I am going to try to cut out many irrelevant and unnecessary words and examples and invest more time in entertaining others than in indulging my own twisted, bizarre sense of nerdy humor. 

I'm hoping that the DELETE button will quicken my pace, elicit better reactions from my audience, and increase the momentum allowing me to tap into new creative areas. 

How do you carve out a beautiful flower from a chunk of marble? Just take out anything that doesn't look like a flower. 

It's the same perspective I come to when studying any subject. Examine the subject and cut out the details. Same with a joke. Death is in the details. 

Speaking of which, did you hear the one about the three guys who die together in an accident and go to heaven? When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks." 

So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks everywhere. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first guy accidentally steps on one. 

St. Peter immediately appears, accompanied by the ugliest woman the guy ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly woman!"

The next day, the second guy accidentally steps on a duck, and again St. Peter appears and chains him to an ugly woman. 

The third guy observes all this and not wanting to be chained all eternity to an ugly woman, is very, VERY careful where he steps. He manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to him with the most gorgeous woman he has ever laid eyes on. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word. 

The guy remarks, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?" 

The woman replies, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck." 

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